Nightmares

One of my biggest fears is not being here. It is one of my biggest struggles as a Father. Knowing that one day someone is going say something that hurts Rett or Levins. People can be cruel sometimes and I try to let Rett know to keep her head up at all times. The nightmare I have is when someone says something about Levins in a negative way. It is definitely something that will happen and making sure I am ready to explain that to Levins or Rett is real.

I can honestly say when I see Levins all I see is my daughter. I see a fighter who will become a gorgeous woman one day. Not everyone will see that. Not everyone will know Levins before they make decisions on how they will feel about her. It's honestly sad that we even have to have those fears.

There will be a day when someone uses the word "Retarted" in reference to my amazing daughter. I honestly do not know how I will react. It is a word that I admittedly used to use when I did something wrong. Now it makes me sick to think about someone using that in reference to the mental capabilities of Levins. I can say that it is not a term I used in vain to hurt someone. I do believe it is time to make a change and retire the word all together. I want people to see her smile and see how she is a beautiful PERSON... Levins has 10 fingers, 10 toes, a heart, and a brain just like everyone else. The only thing different is God choose to bless her with an extra chromosome that makes her smile bigger and care that much more. That is what some think makes her "r"? I think they need to look in the mirror.

This is a fear that will never go away. The only person that can honestly change people's mindset on DS is Levins. I'll admit I had no idea really what DS entailed before Levins. I'll admit I still don't. I never will. I see my daughter, not a label. I see perfection in God's eyes. Really what else matters?

Having a child with a feeding pump and oxygen has its challenges. Not being able to walk from room to room whenever you want with her can be tough. Watching your wife carry everything around all day is stomach turning. Not because she doesn't want to but because she has too. Levins' special needs throughout her life will be challenging, but they will be met. I don't ever get up and say this is easy. I get up everyday and accept the challenge. I get up and thank God for bringing us two beautiful girls. Two girls that have taught their Daddy so much.

Watching Rett with Levins is probably the best moments in my life. Rett sees Levins in the perfect way. It is the way I envision God looking at Levins. The joy and love she has for her is unreal. She sees perfection. She does not see what society may label as imperfect. She sees her sister, someone that she will watch over her entire life.

September 9, 2015 our lives changed forever. They really did. We were blessed with our daughter Ann Levins Mounts. That I believe is what the world is missing using the "r" word. She is our daughter. She is a person. If your reading this, she is a lot like you or your baby. She has major blow out poopies which are gross. Sometimes they make me gag. I'll admit that is one thing I have not gotten a stomach for. She is more like everyone else than many realize. Some things may take longer. She may not walk until she is 2, but we will be there to catch her when she falls. She may not talk as soon as another child, but she will talk. She may not be a brain surgeon, but how many people are.

I will even make a bold statement and say once you meet her you will probably want to be more like her. You will want to love like she loves. I know you will try to smile as big as she does. Trust me I have tried but my whole face can't smile! It's time we stop using the word "Retarted". If I hear someone use it I will probably tell them to define it. I want to know what they think. I feel bad for them. Pray for them. Pray that they too will one day strive to be like Levins.

We all strive to have a purpose in life. I believe one of mine now is to change the thinking on DS. Levins and everyone else who is blessed with DS deserves that. Every child needs advocates. One day when I am not here to protect Levins and Rett I hope they will say we always stood next to them and behind them.

I hope that reading this you know how strong Cullie is. She posted on Instagram the other day and it's something I want to share.

"I can't even begin to express how proud I am to be this precious girl's Mama...today and everyday. I love absolutely everything about her and wouldn't change one wild hair on her head. I love the way she smiles with her entire face and completely melts my heart. I love the way she looks at her sweet sister. I love that she never meets a stranger. I love that she is the happiest baby I know even though she has dealt with more in her short six months, than most people do in a lifetime. But, most of all, I love that God chose to make her mine. #WorldDownSyndromeDay "

That is a Mama that prayed for her perfect child and God answered her prayers. Today I encourage you to pray for society to understand DS. Pray for Levins and Rett that they both get over colds. Pray for Cullie's continued strength. Pray for me and patience when someone uses the wrong words. Thank you for wanting to know our Family. We really appreciate the support!